I played small for way too long. Downplaying my goals, achievements, and ambitions for the benefit of others; to avoid making others feel small and make them feel more comfortable. But in trying to avoid making others feel small, it invalidated my greatness and that made me feel even smaller.
And if you’re reading this, I’m sure you can relate or you wouldn’t have clicked to read this post.
I’ve recently learned to detach from the emotions (and expectations) of others. If living in my truth triggers someone, then I must be doing something right. Ha! Life is a mirror and more often that not, people project their internal reality onto external people or events. The reality of it is, their triggers have nothing to do with me and my ambitions. It has everything to do with their internal reality.
People get uncomfortable because they feel like they aren’t doing anything. When they feel threatened. Maybe there is a lifelong dream they have been ignoring. They are CHOOSING to play small in their life and when I share how BIG I am choosing to play in my life… it makes them feel smaller.
how i stopped playing small
What has been triggering you? Is it while scrolling the gram after seeing a successful working mom who has mastered "having it all"? Meanwhile, your life feels like an epic shit show?
It turns out, our triggers can be our biggest blessing. While envy, anger, and jealous are emotions that we all feel from time to time, pay attention next time you feel one of these emotions. Next time you feel "triggered" make a note to yourself.
Pull out a piece of paper and ask yourself: Why am I feeling triggered? What is "making" me feel this way? What is God, the Universe, or source trying to show me about my internal reality? Where am I not showing up for myself? Dive deep. Feel the feels. Let that shit go.
When you feel fear creep in, acknowledge it, feel it, and thank it. Don’t let it paralyze you. Feel it! Affirm that everything will be okay and keep taking action towards your goals.
If you don’t, you run the risk of staying stuck and feeling small when hearing of someone’s success. Instead, stop playing small and do the work needed to start dreaming BIG.
You got this!
how your triggers are your greatest gift
Most people choose to play small out of fear. Fear of not being enough. Fear of not being worthy. Fear of not fitting in. Fear of failure. Even fear of success.
Success can be scary. Just like goldfish, our growth is limited to our surroundings and what we are exposed to. If you have never been around people who live the life you want, make the money you want, or have a successful business, it makes it harder for you to work towards those goals.
So instead of allowing this excuse to keep you bitter, unaligned, and unhappy, surround yourself with thought leaders who have what you want. Follow them on social media, read their books, take their courses, learn from their mistakes, and let them mentor you in this way. Get out of your comfort zone and thank your fear. She is just trying to protect you.
ACKNOWLEDGE. Acknowledge the fear and the what ifs. Feel it. Write down a list of what the worst case scenario is, confront your fear, and rip up the paper…Guess what? Typically when we do this, it makes our goals less scary.
FOCUS. Focus on where you want to go and why you want to go there. What would make you feel more fulfilled? Your why will be your driving force. The reason you are so discipline. The reason you stay up until 4 am working on your side hustle. WHY? Because of your why, why are you doing it?
ACT. Create an action plan. Set small actionable goals. What are 3 must-do tasks that will drive the needle and get you closer to accomplishing these small actionable goals (& GET YOU CLOSER TO YOUR BIG GOALS)?
3 actionable steps for dreaming bigger
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